Here they are...the ten reasons why running in the 'hood is awesome...or maybe it should be "the ten reasons running in the 'hood makes you run faster."
1. Any runner knows that satellite signals are feast or famine. Either you magically get a signal on your Garmin as soon as you step outside, or you stand there like an idiot staring at your wrist whilst praying to the satellite gods. In my neighborhood, the best place to pick up a satellite signal is on the street corner. (Thisnis probably also the best place to pick up other things in the 'hood as well.) And it takes forever. I attribute this to the large number of 3 deckers blocking clear access to the sky. One day I was standing here, waiting for the satellite gods to smile upon me, when a local crack head came up to me. She noticed my watch. She commented on my iPod. Then she told me to be careful "because there are bad people in this neighborhood and some of them do drugs." You don't say?? Neighborliness isn't dead...even in the 'hood.
2. The "satellite signal corner" is apparently a hot spot for 'hood action because at the start of a different run, my sister and I were standing there when a guy came out of the local dive bar and blocked our path. I forget what he was rambling about because it was mostly incoherent, but I do remember that he grabbed our hands and wouldn't let go. My first thought was, "This is why I live in the city. Because at least someone will hear me scream." But no. He just wanted to be extra friendly. He kissed our hands a few times (Note to self: Start carrying hand sanitizer while out running.) and staggered on his merry way. Like I said-neighborliness isn't dead, even in the 'hood.
3. And speaking of the neighborhood dive bar, this particular place is inexplicably open at all hours. 6am, 10pm, noon-it doesn't matter. If you run by this place, we'll call it the "Ruby Hotel" to protect the innocent (And if you know Grafton Hill at all, you should be able to now figure out the real name of this fancy establishment), there is a crowd of regulars standing outside at all hours. And they are ALWAYS super drunk. So in my 'hood, you have to run the gauntlet past the Ruby Hotel twice during a run. Once coming and once going. Occasionally you'll get dirty catcalls, but most often it's like having your very own (albeit inebriated) cheering squad. They'll cheer for you like you're leading the marathon. They'll congratulate you on a job well done. And the best part is that their cheering section is smack dab in the middle of a hill. So they encourage you to keep running. Because if you stop you are now hanging with the neighborhood cheering squad and while they are fun to run by, you don't really want to stop and hang out with them. Because they will try to kiss your hands. (See point #2 on this list.) But they do have a pretty sweet Mike & Ike dispensing machine just inside the door, so there's that.
4. So as I said earlier, I often run very early in the morning. And at certain times of the year, this is before the sun has come up. My apartment isn't far from the train station. So when you're running in certain directions you have to run through tunnels that have the train tracks above them. They are actually decently lit, but nothing will prepare you for accidentally running into a sleeping homeless person (Spoiler alert-this will scare the shit out of both of you!) or running by a pigeon that you think it dead, only to have it "wake up" and fly at your face. You want to run faster? Come to my neighborhood. Adrenaline is awesome for helping you to increase your speed.
5. Last year I was binge watching The Walking Dead. So I had zombies on my mind. When you run by the common at 5am, you could swear that the zombie apocalypse is well underway. There are no cars on Main Street. The common is filled with people just waking up and staggering in the manner of the "walkers" on the aforementioned zombie show. It's unreal. And it messes with your head.
6. Remember my neighbor with the ill-fitting garage? He always has lots of people hanging out on his porch. Sometimes they sleep there. On the porch. If I go running early in the morning, there will sometimes be people sleeping on his porch. And they are usually still sound asleep when I return. I pretty much live for following his shenanigans.
7. Long runs are the best. Because that's when I venture into new territory and see new, exciting things. On one long run last fall, I was down on Main South. Now most people don't think good things when you say Main South, but here's a little known fact. You will find the BEST cheerleaders down there. People will clap for you, tell you how awesome you are, tell you to keep up the good work, and if it happens to be raining out-they will be doubly impressed. Running on Main South is like being in your own personal parade where everyone loves you. It's awesome.
8. Of course, with the awesome cheering square comes the weird. One long run down in that next of the woods caused my path to cross with a David Koresh look alike. He had a mullet. He was wearing all white. He was carrying what appeared to be a samurai sword slung across his back. And there he was, just walking down the street like this was a totally normal thing to do on a Saturday morning. It was awesome.
9. Sometimes you get to see people trying to take steps towards a healthier lifestyle. One time, near that same neighborhood, I saw a man in the distance who was running and wearing what looked like scrubs. Now one very important thing to know about me is that everything is secretly a competition. (I can't help this. I'm just wired that way.) If you're on the treadmill next to me, we're racing. If you're in the pool lane next to me, we're racing. If you're running on Park Ave ahead of me...I naturally want to catch you. So when I saw this guy, I picked up the pace. As I got closer, I realized that he wasn't wearing scrubs. He was wearing acid washed jeans and a Member's Only jacket. As I passed him I realized that he was holding a legit disc man. This guy was apparently running full speed towards 1984.
10. And finally...the BEST reason to run in my 'hood?! Turtleboy, of course! If getting to run past a celebrated statue of a boy riding a turtle (A turtle who appears to be screaming out in pain, I might add.) isn't motivating, then I don't know what is!!
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